Journal Entry #1

Alright.  So I realize that I feel committed in my being.  This is not a fleeting moment of inspiration.  This is the dedication that comes after having invested blood, sweat and tears into experimentation and having arrived at a conclusion that is penultimate.  I am committed.

When I think about what this means, I realize that the story doesn’t matter.  What matters is that my mind, body and spirit are all aligned and going in the same direction.

So here’s to what I am committing:

1.  I AM.  I am committed to the practice of knowing myself as I AM, seeing my brothers through the eyes of I AM, and experiencing the world through the totality of I AM.  In other words, I am committed to taking the Higher Perspective and living through my open heart and trusting mind.
2. Self-Realization.  I am committed to the practice of living the standards as offered by my Higher Self.  Creating great works here on earth, following my ideas through to completion, and working with integrity and excellence.  Being the lovable, creative, generous and productive being that I AM.
3. Body.  I am committed to the practice of rebuilding my body from head to toe.  Detoxifying, unblocking, purging; releasing and surrendering tension, resistance, attachments, and addiction to old story patterns of limitation, neglect and misalignment.
4. Emotions.  I am committed to the practice of exploring the light that rests beyond my emotional self, not by bypassing the darker emotions, but by re-membering the Truth in every moment.  I am committed to recognizing the stuckness of emotions and setting myself free with compassion.
5. Nourishment.  I am committed to the practice of nourishing myself with the fruit of life.  I nourish myself with Life Force Energy (air,) activated water, high vibrational, living food, beautiful intimate relationships, fun times and an unconditionally loving relationship with myself.

As I look back on my commitments, I feel a sense of dread.  The old fears of having ‘failed’ before– having abandoned my dreams, hopes and wishes; of being one who betrays her desires and sells out herself with a wavering commitment… But my list of commitments is filled with compassion and room for error.  I use words like practice, which to me means, to spend time learning and improving.  To practice is not to perfect.  I used also surrender, freeing and unconditionally loving.  These are all words that imply letting go and letting God.  This is total compassion.

I suppose that this Radiance Challenge can actually be a Compassion Challenge.  Extending compassion to myself as I ameliorate my inner world and prepare to launch into a more powerful expression of Self.